Emilie Pines Notes To Self is beautiful raw collection of personal essays that will resonate with any woman reading it. She splits the book into personal moments - from her fathers alcoholism leading to him being desperately ill because of it, to her relationship with her body from teenage years to miscarriages. This is a beautifully written collection that left me upended, but also comforted. Thank you Hamish Hamilton for sending this my way. As with any collection, you have ones you're most attached to. For me it was on her fathers alcoholism, her miscarriages and the one about her relationship with her parents. These hit me at my core, not that the other essays didn’t but I connected to these three the most. Pine tackles topics that would be tough to write about in a fictional manner, but honestly opens up about her experiences of them. She is brave, she is fierce, she is a wonderful writer. I read this book in one sitting because I fell in love with it, but it is also the kind of book you can have at your bedside to read an essay at a time. Pine has an honest style to her writing that wraps you into her world. It's gorgeous, heartbreaking and brave. It is a wonderful memoir that will make a great addition to any persons life and their shelf. I look forward to seeing more from Emilie Pine!

Trigger warning: this book discusses alcoholism, infertility and sexual violence. “I am afraid of being the disruptive woman. And of not being disruptive enough. I am afraid. But I am doing it anyway.” Notes to Self is a collection of six essays discussing the events that have shaped Pine’s life- and often the reader’s - but are so painful there are no adequate words to describe them. With razor-like precision and unflinching honesty, Pine explores these formative experiences in prose that feels deeply personal yet representative of so much female experience. She writes about the fraught nature of loving an alcoholic in Notes on Intemperance; in From the Baby Years she describes the unspeakable grief of infertility and pregnancy loss; Something About Me is a staggering essay about sexual violence and reckless living that knocked me for six. All the essays are raw and powerful, and so relatable - there are feelings we all live that seem undefinable in words yet Pine captures them on the page, casting light on taboos and articulating the harsh, often heart-breaking realities of life. But if Notes to Self is unsparing and uncompromising, it’s uplifting and joyous too, and the final line is a mantra for all: “I am afraid. But I am doing it anyway.”

One of the finest works of non-fiction I've read in some time, Notes to Self is a tour-de-force of self-analysis, memory, shared female experience and finely honed rage. I read it what felt like one long breathless, tear-stained gulp. Emilie Pine moves from powerfully honest exploration of deeply personal experiences - including her father's alcoholism and her own infertility - to a place of common ground. In her hands the personal becomes universal, shining a light on subjects that are not only rarely covered but often actively kept in the darkness. The writing is fresh, the range astonishing but it was her ability to reach out from the page and keep me unblinkingly hooked that impressed me the most. This is an extraordinary work, I can't recommend it highly enough.

An absolutely brilliant collection of essays where no subject is too painful for examination: female pain, infertility, alcoholism, families, and violence (both against women and against the self). Despite these heavy topics, this memoir does leave the reader feeling great hope. Heartbreaking, but also gorgeous.

‘Notes to self’ is a collection of essays that are astonishingly truthful. They focus on major events in the author’s life - her father’s alcoholism, her infertility and on the sexual violence she experienced herself when she was young. Wonderfully written, this collection will make you cry, but is ultimately joyful. I particularly liked the line the collection ended on: “I am afraid. But I am doing it anyway.” I was lucky enough to be sent a reading copy in exchange for an honest review.